Once I got my bearings after my divorce was final, I created a no-deviation, written-in-ink, no-distractions-allowed five-year life plan and it was my intent to adhere to those plans to the letter. At the base of those plans, I had planned to stay single for those five years.
My intent to stay single had nothing to do with a mistrust in the entire male population, love, or commitment. I just didn’t want to be part of a relationship because I wanted to focus exclusively on rebuilding myself as a woman, to grind extra hard in my sales career, to blog like it was a religion, and to help other women escape the horror of domestic abuse.
The Beauty of Being Single
First and foremost, being single allows you to do whatever you want to do, whenever you want to, whichever way you want to do it! That, in and of itself, is incentive enough for some women to stay in that single lane for a long time. You also become much more self-reliant. This is one that I had to re-learn after my divorce. Before I got married, I accomplished many things that were the epitome of the feminist that I am.
Who Cares What They Think
I have to say I’m really shocked at the stigma attached to being single. I’ve heard so much negativity about being single. I’ve heard everything from, “she can’t get a man” to “she can’t keep a man”. Seriously? What if she doesn’t want a man? That’s possible, you know. Perhaps she is enjoying her own company enough that she doesn’t feel the need to be completed by another. Perhaps she is comfortable enough with being alone with herself, her surroundings, circumstance, and situation that she is good without sharing it with a man. Maybe, just maybe, she doesn’t feel the need conform to society’s insistence that she have a man.
Whatever your reason for being single is your reason. Contrary to what some people will have you believe, being single is not a curse, it’s not a bad place, nor is it a lonely place. Enjoy your time there. Stay as long as you like.